Summer Vacation 2011-Fun and Sun Found Us!

Day 3
A miracle happened overnight, and we awoke to the beautiful sun shining down on the gorgeous beach. The kids didn't fight ALL day. God must have been listening to my prayers. It was a glorious day! My friend Stacey and her family came over the latter part of the day and her four kids (ages 13, 10, 9, 8) and my three kids (ages 11, 6, 4) had a blast playing together, and I got to hang with my girl. We even had a nice Mexican dinner out and everyone was well behaved. Here are a few pics.







Tonight, we wanted to take the kids crabbing on the beach. At first we couldn't find any, then these nice kids came by and dumped their bucket full of crabs for the boys to catch. It was awesome! The boys had the best time, well, except Roman. He screamed and ran for higher ground. Then, he jumped on top of a beach chair, where he remained until Jude carried him back to the condo. The crabs freaked him out, and that is when you realize just what a baby he is. My little man!

Summer Vacation 2011--Finding Fun

Day 2
Today we woke up to more rain. Rain, rain, rain!

We ate breakfast and then tried to wait the rain out, all the while trying to make backup plans in case it stayed.

After my nice little morning workout (yay for me!), we chose to head to the movies at the Wharf,

with the kids kicking and screaming. Well, so did everyone else; more chaotic traffic. The movie ticket line was long, and in the rain might I add. After standing in line for a good twenty minutes, I had the bright idea to ditch the movies and head across the street to Laser Tag. A bright idea it was!

The boys had a great time, and so did we.

So much better than a packed movie, and for $88, about the same price. After, we went home for leftover pizza and stared out the window, wishing the clouds away. Around 4:30 pm, it semi-cleared up. It was windy and a bit chilly, but we were determined to play in the water. We went out to the beach and pool for about two hours and the boys had a blast. Although it rained basically the entire day, we managed to fit in some good, family fun and today was much better than yesterday. We ended the evening with Cullen getting his annual henna tattoo. He got two this time; the Monster logo and Fox motocross logo. Thank God that child can not get permanent tattoos at this age! He would be a walking billboard.
Anyway, if our days continue at this rate, the day we leave may be the best day yet:)

Summer Vacation 2011--Far From Perfect

Day 1
Today we left home for a week in the sunny state of Florida. "Sunny" being the key word! We even rented our condo from a lady named Sunshine. I was positive it would be a hot week of fun and sun. So, where is this beautiful thing called SUN?! We drove through tons of rain to get here. Rain, shine, rain, shine...sunglasses on, off, on, off....it was annoying and traffic sucked. The kids aggravated each other the entire way here, which in turn, aggravated me. Lunch at our favorite travel restaurant, Cracker Barrel, was decent and a nice little break. By the time we arrived three states over, attitudes changed and everyone was happy...for about an hour. We unpacked, attempted some rainy memories at the beach and the pool, and then we went to eat at Lillian's Pizza. I was so stressed out by the time we ordered (and starved), I shed a few tears. Seriously. This isn't the "vacation" I envisioned. This was hell. I ordered a glass of wine, had yet another talk with the children about their behavior, and hoped for the best while leaving my 'perfect vacation week' expectations behind.
Walmart was next on the list and we were checking out at the registers at midnight. More misery. I tried to go alone, but every time I mentioned going somewhere alone, Jude would state "It's a family vacation and we do stuff together as a family". Aaack! I bought a good book titled "The Help" (I haven't read a fictional book since my teen years) and ended the evening lying in bed reading it, praying for a better tomorrow.

(*PRD is staying with Jude's parents this week. I miss him madly!!)

If I die before I wake...

Who in the hell is going to take care of my four boys?! (Well, Jude would have to have died too, of course.) Assuming Cullen's dad is still alive, he would want Cullen. That leaves three boys (whom I wouldn't want to separate in the first place). Jude and I have discussed this time and time again, and it's not that we don't agree on anyone, we just have no idea WHO to choose. It would be like a death sentence to whomever we picked. No winning! Both sets of our parents are in their mid-sixties and three out of four are handicapped to some degree from accidents or past surgeries. I feel as if we would be ruining their lives. I know we would. Jude is an only child, and I have one older sister. To say we are not close is an understatement. She doesn't even like to hold my boys at holidays because "they're germ carriers". She has one teenage son who is almost out of the house. She's done. So here I am, laying in bed, wondering about the worst case scenario. Both sets of our parents have said that they would want them, but how do you choose? When you do decide, do you tell the set that you didn't pick, or do you wait until you are dead and gone, then cause them more pain? How do you even start to create a custody arrangement on children YOU chose to have? Our parents would all be eighty-something before the last boy left the house. That's insane to think about! I'm looking for that magic answer and wasting time as the years go by with no legal plan. Any ideas or advice? Any takers? <---That was a joke!

THE FIVE MOST IMPORTANT MEN IN MY LIFE!

Me? A.D.D.?

And so it is so. Cullen gets it from his momma.
I started reading an AOL article about ADD, and it took off from there. I recognized so many of the symptoms in myself, that I decided to take some quizzes I found online. They all came back "You have ADD". I then decided to talk to my mom, who was sleeping over that weekend, and she said it wouldn't hurt to talk to my doctor about it. Apparently, many decisions in my past kinda make sense now when their is a medical reason to explain the impulsivity I had growing up. (I am still super impulsive now!) I talked to Jude about it, and when telling him the symptoms of adult ADD, his response was that all adults could fit in that category. He then took the quiz himself online, and he got "You are NOT ADD". My point proven. I understand that we can all be forgetful, impulsive, unorganized, habitually late, etc., but when you look back and realize it has affected your entire life, there is a problem there. As much as I would like to list all the "events" that took place in my life that make all this make sense now, I don't want to share with the world all my past failures and beat myself up in black and white. I was depressed for a few days when I figured this all out, with my self diagnosis, because I kept thinking of all the things I would have done differently, had I known all along that I had ADD. It took a few people telling me that I wouldn't be where I am now (in a VERY HAPPY PLACE) if I changed anything in my past. I get it now. It just hit hard the first few days.
So, I made an appointment with my family doctor and went in to talk to her about it. She told me she would like a psychological evaluation before we do anything to treat it, just to verify and be cautious. I then made an appointment with a psychologist and took the ADD test. While speaking in the psychologists office, she asked me to start with school and go on from there with how well or poor I did and what events took place in my life after. When we were done talking, I realized even more what a problem this has been in my life. Really. She diagnosed me with ADHD, with the symptoms of impulsivity and attention deficit. (I am not the hyper type, the term ADHD is the only one they use in the medical field now, followed with your symptoms, no more "ADD".)
The next step was going back to my family doctor and deciding what to do. I did, and I chose to give prescriptions a try. Cullen takes them (as I have blogged about previously) and I see them work in him daily. I am on day three at the moment, as this all went down in March. I am trying to get used to the effects of it.
Like I stated previously, I was a tad depressed when all this hit me, and I have gone back and forth on wanting to share this with the world. But, as you all know, I am an open book, and in being that way, I have connected with others going through some of the same issues I've faced. I decided to share this. You can judge me, talk about me, do what you have to do. I know I am making the right choice in my life right now and Jude is supporting me one hundred percent, which means the world to me. We will see how this first prescribed medication helps (or doesn't) and I hope to update everyone in a few weeks. Maybe I will have the attention capability to continue on with my blogging. We'll see.
Also, to my very close friends, past and present, if you have noticed any ADHD qualities in me in the past, please feel free to discuss them openly with me. I learned a lot about myself last month and all feedback is welcome, positive or negative. I told one good friend about my ADHD, whose response was "no way!". I told another good friend who said "I knew that about you already." The feedback is interesting;) Thanks!

Dancing with the Stars, Fifth Grade Edition

When Cullen came home months ago with a paper from his school announcing they were doing a "Dancing with the Stars" type of class for the fifth graders, I was eager to sign the permission slip and get Cullen started. Cullen, on the other hand, was totally against it. I had a feeling when I signed the permission slip, it wasn't going to get turned in. I even threatened him, saying I was going to check up on him and this dancing at the parent/teacher conferences, to make sure he was attending. It is during the PE hour. Well, guess what, I didn't follow through. So, months go by, and one day Cullen slips up and says something like, "That's the time all the other kids go to dance."
Wait! Hold up! Back up!
"Cullen, you didn't do the dance class like I told you to?!" It had been a couple months in at this point. Oh, did he get an ear full! He was grounded from all the glorious things he liked. I knew that permission slip was going to disappear!
Within a few days, without me telling him to, and in trying to redeem himself, he approached the coach and professional dance instructor at school and tried weaseling his way in the class. He was successful, too. That boy! He is a permanent substitute, in case any kids miss class, but he has been learning the dances and catching on quick and...HE LIKES IT! Imagine that. My whole point in wanting him to sign up was to try something new and see if he would like it. I want my kids to be well rounded and learn all sorts of new things while they are young. Cullen is a fantastic soccer player, baseball player, he's figured out football is not his thing, nor basketball, he is in Jiu Jitsu, is an awesome artist, and he is learning a second language of Spanish. He can add ballroom dancer to that list now. I want to push them to experience the most out of life. One day, they will thank me. As for now, he is giving me great memories to cherish forever.
Cullen, and his friends


Here are the video links of his new found skill...
The Salsa
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ii97DSTbFUk
The Waltz
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQv5J8XBY1k
Swing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHXEkQwlhdM
Tango
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=549pNxMXz60
Merengue
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaAvpg8sYmU

A gift for you, a gift for me...

Cullen and Aiden's school had a Santa's Secret Workshop going on this week. That is where they bring money to school and shop for mom/dad/siblings/etc. on their own time. The gifts cost anywhere from $1-$15, or so. I gave them each $6 per family member, with five people to buy for, equals $30 each.
When I handed the boys their envelopes filled out, Aiden immediately asked if he could have some extra money so he could buy himself something. I explained Christmas is about giving, not receiving, blah, blah, blah. I asked him how he would feel if I bought myself a Christmas gift, and not him, which he answered he wouldn't like it. We had a good five minute conversation, which I thought ended with him clearly understanding what Christmas gifting is all about.
I walked to pick them up from school today and the first thing Aiden says is, "I bought myself something today. I had enough money!". "How was that possible?", I wondered. His answer, "I spent less on you all and I had money left over." I think we may need to have the whole "what Christmas is all about" discussion again! He was mighty sad when I told him it, too, was going under the tree with all the other gifts.
Cullen, on the other hand, informed me he brought his own birthday money he had left over from last month so he could spend MORE on us than what he was given. Awww, my baby! Goes to show you what a few years difference will do to a child's maturity level. Makes a momma proud!

Baby, it's cold outside!

It is really starting to feel like winter down here! The two little ones and I had been hiding in the house on Monday and Tuesday. Today, we decided to go have lunch and grab some ice cream. I love snuggling with my two small, silly, babies in this weather. It is a challenge to get out of our pj's.

Thanksgiving 2010

A few people that I am most thankful for...

Growing up, all I ever wanted in life was to fall in love and live happily ever after. Seriously. I didn't dream of getting a big job position or earning a title in the business field. Money has never mattered to me. I'm not materialistic, though I do enjoy some modern things;) I remember a guy (some strange date once) asked me what I wanted out of life. I don't think I had given it much thought before that night, as I was young, eighteen. I vividly remember we were on the beach in Florida, it was late, and my answer was...a husband, a nice three bedroom house, two cars in the driveway, and a couple kids. Some might say that wasn't dreaming big, but I am a romantic at heart and all I hoped for was that perfect mate. Hoped. I dated many turkeys back in my time, and though I didn't always make the best decisions, I somehow always came out OK. (I must have had a guardian angel somewhere.) I learned from many of those experiences, and there were many experiences. lol No two relationships were the same. There were no patterns. I never had a "type". I liked tall, dark and handsome, but always found myself with guys very similar looking to Jude (not tall, not dark!). I think God was just preparing me for what was to come.
This Thanksgiving, I have so much to be thankful for. Jude is at the top of my list. HE is what I was always searching for. The day I met him, I knew he was the one, we just had many years added in there to build a friendship and get to know each other. My life was very messy back then. We took our sweet time getting to know each other and that is something I had never done before. Now, we have a relationship like no other. We were newlyweds the first five years of our marriage. That's a great start! I knew going into this marriage what I was looking for and he has fulfilled every hope and desire. You may have an impressive degree, the finer things in life, or a super duper fancy title...but I have all I have ever wanted right here at home: an amazing husband, and four handsome little men that I hope grow up to be wonderful husbands just like their father, as he leads by example. I believe everything happens for a reason! (I met this person, so I could meet the next person, and the next, and so on. I took this job instead of that job for a reason that led me to this time in my life, etc.) I can literally trace back all the steps to that night back on the beach talking to that guy, that led me to right here, right now. All my blessings in my life today have to do with family and friends. Thank you, Jude, just for being you. Thank you, God, for gifting him to me.

Erikk, The Elf on the Shelf

Attention parents: YOU MUST BUY THIS BOOK! $29.95
I can't believe I didn't know the story behind this book any sooner.
People have failed me!!
This book answers the age old question, "How does Santa really know if we are being 'naughty or nice?'".
The answer: a small pixie elf remains in your home for a few weeks until Christmas Day, acting as Santa's eyes and ears. He reports the children's behavior to St. Nick himself daily, and each year the elf returns to perform its assigned task.
The Elf (which the kids name) goes back to the North Pole every night while the kids are sleeping and gives Santa a daily report. Each morning, the kids have to find where the Elf is because he moves around at night. That's a fun game, too. If they touch the Elf, he loses his magic and Santa will think the kids forgot about him. Only parents can talk to the Elf. He has strict orders from Santa to not talk to the children. Whenever there is drama in our household, all we have to say are four magic words..."The Elf is watching!". For $29.95, you can't put a price on the peace and quiet it brings!
Jude is reading them the book, and Erikk the Elf is sitting on the window sill

www.elfontheshelf.com

Happy 11th birthday, Cullen!

The day I found out I was pregnant with Cullen, my life changed almost instantly. The year was 1999 and I was days away from turning twenty one. Looking back, I was definitely at the worst stage of my entire life, though I didn't realize it then. I was wild, carefree, irresponsible, partying, and had no true path in front of me. I met a boy in a bar in New Orleans and within months, we were in love, expecting, and married. I almost got whiplash from how fast things changed. From that point on, I knew I wanted to be the best mommy I could be, even if it meant being a single mother to provide a better atmosphere and household for him. Cullen and I have been through so much together. When I look back at his eleven years, I not only see how much he has matured, but I see how much I have, too. From the day I met Jude, my life only got better. We were an official couple on Cullen's third birthday, got engaged on his fourth birthday, and married by his fifth birthday. Jude and I, together, with God as our leader, are raising him the way I envisioned life should and would be. Today, Cullen has four loving parents, four sets of families that adore him, and though life isn't the perfect cookie cutter scenario, I can't imagine it any better with all the love and support he has.
Cullen always throws me the curve balls. By the time you have a second child, you kind of know what to expect with each age and stage of that next child. By the fourth child (in our case, fourth boy) I feel very sure of myself. But Cullen, he is almost like my experimental child. I am going through life trying to raise him with no experience, without knowing what to expect next and questioning myself all along the way. When I look at him and see that sweet, loving, sensitive, smart, artistic, well mannered, handsome child, I am reassured we are ALL on the right path...together. I can't ask for much more in life.
His little brothers have some big shoes to fill!
Happy birthday to my baby!

Cullen, his friend Christian, and Aiden

Our weekend

Saturday, Preston, Roman, and I went to the park to play in this beautiful weather.




Sunday, my dad was in town so he and I went to the local market and walked around. I bought some cute glasses, too.
Here, Preston is modeling a pair.


*Cullen was at his dads this weekend.
*Aiden spent the whole weekend at his Nanny and Paw Paws's house having Aiden-time.

Nicholas Jude, Preston's first friend

I was so excited to find out my friend Heather was pregnant, only weeks after Jude and I learned we were. I had a friend to go through pregnancy with!

Also, that meant my baby would have a baby friend, too. A win, win. Nicholas Jude (how can you not LOVE the name?) was born about seven weeks after Preston entered the world and today the two little men met for the first time. Nicholas is adorable! The two little blond boys peeked at each other. I'm sure they were just shocked and amazed to see someone their own size. Here are a few pictures from their meet and greet...



Preston in disbelief...

There will be many more play dates to come!

Welcome Preston!

Two weeks and some days ago the sweetest little man was born to complete our family and make us a six pack. Preston Rene arrived September 14, 2010, with a little help called inducing. He was stubborn leaving my womb, but oh-so-precious at his arrival. 8.15 lbs and 21.25 inches. He was long and skinny. The first thing he did was stretch his legs out and pee on me. Great first impression! The hospital has this new skin-to-skin thing they do, so they immediately layed him on me, where he stayed for at least an hour. He didn't cry much, and surprisingly, neither did I. That's a first! No tears. We were so content just cuddling. He roomed in with us. I wanted him as much as possible. Reason being, I knew when I got home there would be no more one-on-one alone time. I attempted breastfeeding for the first time also. When we left the hospital, my new baby had a bad case of jaundice. He was yellow. His skin, eyes, mouth, everywhere. We had to go to the doctors office, and even the hospital lab (on Sunday) to test his levels daily. By his one week birthday, they were down to a good level and we were done worrying about that. All my boys were born with it, but none had it as bad as Preston.
His older brothers adore him! He was a hit the moment he was carried in the front door. He is really a good baby, too. He likes to stay up late and sleep in late. This morning I had to wake him after 4 1/2 hours of sleep to feed him. He was out! His nicknames so far from mommy are Press-Press, Sticks, and PRD (pronounced PURD). Sticks because he loves to stick his little skinny legs out and stretch, just like he did when he came out the womb. At times, it looks like he is doing pilates. So cute! Not related, he also like s to throw both arms up in the air randomly, like he is riding a roller coaster. It is usually when he is startled. There are times we do not remember his name, sadly. It's not that we draw a blank, we just call him Roman, over and over. Tonight, we were checking out at Party City and I heard Jude talking so sweet to him, and he's calling him Roman in their private conversation. I think he is going to be so confused in a year if we do not straighten that out!
Preston is perfect! He is our last edition/addition and he is the missing puzzle piece to this family of all boys and one queen B.

The sex talk, minus the sex

Friday night is family movie night at our house, a tradition we just recently started. Tonight we rented "Look Who's Talking" so the boys could see a newborn baby with his "daily thoughts". Anyway, as soon as the movie started, you have the sperm swimming to the egg. From that point on, Cullen tried to ask a million questions during the entire movie. I tried to fast forward through a few parts, including the opening, but that didn't stop him. I told him to hold all his questions until the movie was over, and for when his brothers weren't around. Then Aiden chimes in, "We're ALWAYS going to be around!". So sorry we picked this movie! When it was over, it was late, almost eleven, and I told Jude to have a seat because I was not doing this sex talk alone. I already knew the questions to expect for the most part, but I was SURE he was going to ask about the birds and the bees. We haven't had that talk yet. He's ten.
So, Cullen starts the conversation off asking if those were sperm. "Yes, they were."
C: "What were they doing?"
Me: "Swimming to the egg."
C: "The woman has the egg?" "Yes."
C: "How do they know to come out?"
Me: Thinking logically, I said "Gravity". I was thinking the wrong way.
Jude: "When a man and woman are married, the sperm just know that it is time to come out."
C: "Then how come people who aren't married have babies?"
Me: "Because you can do anything you want to do with your life, but there will be CONSEQUENCES! Some people make the wrong decisions before marriage."
C: Starts going through a list of young people he knows that are single parents.
Me: "Do any of those people have wonderful family lives or do they struggle taking care of their child alone?"
C: "Struggle." I gave him a few examples.
Me: "You can do anything you want, in the end, it is your decision, your life, and you are the one who will suffer the consequences." I then brought God into the conversation and also informed him that just because the girl has the baby doesn't mean she will raise it. He could end up raising the child, and I told him to look at his little brothers as examples of how demanding children can be. You don't get a break. They are permanent.
The conversation continued with questions about sperm donors, enemas, and lesbians; not in that order.
Jude tried to answer the sperm donation question and it started off with "A man puts his sperm in a jar...". I almost fell out my chair to stop him. I told Cullen it is a very technical medical procedure and is something he can wait to learn about later on in life. There is a such thing as TMI.
The entire talk was an awkward conversation to say the least, but he did not once ask about the actual act of "sex", and it was too late in the night for me to dive into it. My brain was half off. I am a little worried he may already know things I don't want him to know from his peers.
My parents didn't have the birds and the bees talk with me until it was too late. I don't want that for him, but I am also clueless in this area on what to say. I think I need a book of some kind. Any suggestions?

(Let me just end this post with, as an adult, I am aware of many healthy, wonderful, families who are headed by single parents, but I am not about to fill my young child's head with stuff I do not want for him. I only pray he does not knock up some teenage girl, which could make me a grandparent in the next three to nine years.)

Summer is done!

Another non-blogging month long hiatus and I am ready for story time again.

Cullen started school last week. He is an "old and wise" fifth grader now. (At least that is what he would like to believe.)
Aiden's first day of school was today, my big kindergartner.

They were drawing pictures of themselves. Notice the yellow hair Aiden has drawn. First thing. That is how he identifies himself in every self portrait. I love it!


Time just flies on by, and this time next year, Roman will be entering into the Spanish Immersion program his brother is in. They will be talking about me in Spanish in no time, I just know it.
The good news is I survived the summer, and no one was harmed. Bonus! Having just Roman home today was nice. Very nice. We even took a nap together in my bed. Jude has been on vacation all week and home from work. He has cleaned the house from top to bottom and taken care of majority of the household duties, while I have sat and watched television, leaving nothing left on the TiVo to watch. The last couple weeks of being pregnant has caused me quite a few issues and Jude doesn't want me to do ANYTHING, though I think bed rest would drive me absolutely nuts. It is HARD to sit and do nothing all day. Jude is the greatest husband a girl could ever ask for! I hope my boys are learning from him:)

Just...can't...stop...

SEWING! It is so fun to create all these cute burp cloths and very relaxing to sew. This morning I took the three boys to Krispy Kreme for breakfast and we dined inside and watched them make the donuts, which we've never done together. After, we went over to the library and played, checked some books out, and met up with the Castillo's. We then headed to a fabric store to pick out some cute(r) fabric and ribbons since I've semi-completed ten and still had fourteen more to do. Amy was a big help in picking out some designs. It's like having four eyes instead of two. She also has different tastes than I do, so she sees cute patterns that I may overlook. We make a great team:) We headed to our house with some lunch. Then we went down to another fabric store for more fabric quarters and ribbons. I am really beginning to love this new hobby. Here are the latest creations. I cannot wait to embroider little Preston's name (or initials) on them!
This is the basic look of the cloths opened up.
Love the blue and white polkas with yellow trim

A fave: the brown designs on the blue, with the brown ribbon trim

Pirates ahoy! A treasure map with black and white polkas for trim

Another fave: Ships, labeled by type under them, with dark blue and white polkas

Boy pattern all the way with different wheels, trimmed in dark blue and white polkas

I really want to make some girly ones, so when I am done with Preston's, I may just do that for the fun of it.